05 April, 2018

Moving Forward Fearlessly. Or Attempting.

I am the sort to be bogged down by decisions, by projects with no clearly defined parameters, by ideas with no path to execution. As a creative person, this fear has been a roadblock. A wall, ten thousand feet high, built of fear of failure, terror at the idea of commitment, trepidation at choice. Choice of the wrong path. So I make no choice. I think about what I will do, and I wait in the place where all I do is ponder. Because thinking is safe. Lack of effort is safe. No attempt is safe. I let myself stay there for a long time, locking the cell from the inside against feelings of inadequacy. I was safe there, but not free. The key was overthinking.

Thinking, thought... the catalyst of my creative process. But I can't allow the fire to die there. Unlock the door, let the oxygen in the room so the fire can breathe. Open the door and let the fire out to explore and burn up the world so it can be born anew.

Are you thinking about doing something? Something big, something new, an adventure? Is there something you want to do physically? Don't wait. Try. Give your enterprise your effort. That's where the magic happens. Books don't write themselves entirely in your head. Headstands don't happen because you look at pictures of inversions on the IG. You don't get faster or stronger purely by dreaming. Your hamstrings don't stretch themselves. Recipes don't cook or bake by sitting on your counter. New skills are learned in the doing. If you want something, ask. Designs don't turn to reality without your handiwork.

Are you afraid? I am, too. It's okay. It's normal. Go ahead and do it anyway.