I went to the doctor today.
Not Achilles Tendinitis. I wish it was.
Some stage of Posterior Tibular Tendon stress, whether it's tendinitis or an actual tear is yet to be determined.
I had my first ever MRI today. It's strange, this diagnostic system, in a cold room, wrapped in a blanket in a fake-recliner-like chair, watching The Natural, while a very, very, very kind man gets me cozy and runs a machine that will tell me whether or not my foot will function normally again. I love The Natural.
Mistake made: Googling the prognosis of this problem. I see these pictures of surgeries, post-surgical x-rays of people with screws in their heels and arches. And I wonder why genetics threw me this curveball.
I've worked so hard to get to where I am. First in my age group once on the bike this year, second in another race. My run times were getting better too. Even my swims.
I'm afraid of getting old and fat. I'm afraid of losing something that has become so engrained in who I am, my identity as a triathlete. I've done things people told me I couldn't and wouldn't do, racing four months after delivery by c-section, doing my first half Ironman five months after that. I feel lost and set adrift.
Sorry for the negativity here. I shoot for positivity, but tonight I feel a little emotionally beat.
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2 comments:
Did they give you any suggestions on keeping some of the fitness? Like swimming and yoga? What is the timeline of recovery? Keep positive thoughts. You're young & the fitness level won't drop too much. I've been there with the tibia stress fracture. It's not fun but patience is key to healing.
I'm waiting to hear a definite plan of action after he looks over the MRI... I expect to hear something by Friday, if not earlier.
As soon as I heal up from this bike accident, I think I'm good to go for swimming and yoga, and maybe even biking. The two treatment options are dependent on whether or not the tendon is torn. If it isn't, I just wear a boot to stabilize everything, followed by PT. If it is, surgery, boot, PT. I think I'm mostly afraid of the surgery... not because Dr. Johnson isn't competent (he definitely is...), but just because it's surgery on my foot. I guess part of me is afraid of never running again.
Sorry for writing a blog post in the form of a comment :D
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